I'm sorry

Starscream1994 · **Posted:** Sun Oct 22, 2017 2:39 am

This is gonna be a long post so brace yourselves. About a little over a month ago I was in an accident. Only a select few people in EgN actually knew because I didn't want to make a big deal out of it. At the time the only vehicle I had acess to was a moped, which in my state is allowed to be driven on the street. I had a job at that point in time to and was happy to try to get my life going in the right direction again. My moped had some shotty breaks from the start as it was given to me for free and I couldn't really complain. I was on my way to work and tried to use my breaks at a stop sign. Because they were crappy/too sensitive I ended up flipping completely off of the moped hitting the hard pavement in only shorts and a t-shirt. Yes I know dumb things to wear but its basically always hot where I live and I wasn't expecting to crash (as if anybody ever is). I had a bunch of skin missing from my hands, arms, and knees for a few weeks. I also had to go to the hospital after having pain from walking, getting in and out of bed, sitting, lifting, breathing in and out, and even coughing. It turns out I had a swollen chest cavity, which made it really difficult to even do simple things without being in pain. My job was physical which required me to move relatively quickly and I had 2 options. Quit my job, or apply for medical leave. Naturally I applied for medical leave and was given 2 weeks. Unfortunately what the insurance company failed to mention is that I had to go see another doctor to get a form to be able to go back to work. I could not afford this as I do not have insurance. So for 3 days I went back and forth with the insurance company, my job, and the hospital. Ultimately I lost my job because I could not provide that form nor could I afford the exam. The moped I was using is now broken and unusable and because I have no job currently I can't afford to get a new one or even a real car. Now let me get to the point of this long story. Since I lost my job and my only wheels I fell into a deep depression. I alienated myself from other people, I stopped playing on EgN servers mostly, and I was straight up an asshole to a lot of people. I don't wanna be that guy anymore. I wronged some of you, and stopped talking to others completely. It took me a while to realize my destructive behavior was only making me more miserable than before. I made a mistake and I'm sorry. I'm sorry to everyone that has spoken to me in the past month or so, I'm sorry to the people who I use to talk to and now don't talk to me, I'm sorry for any angry things I might have said or anything I might have done. I'm sorry for not being a man and owning up to what I was doing instead of sitting alone by myself angry at the world. I don't expect everyone to forgive me but I felt like it was time to explain what was wrong. I'm trying to take steps to better myself and my life.

I'm sorry EgN

BriBee · **Posted:** Sun Oct 22, 2017 2:43 am

Y S0 S3R10US · **Posted:** Sun Oct 22, 2017 3:00 am

Mate, you are all good in my books, all I hope for is that you get back on your feet, spend as much time as you need to get back on your feet.

Geeza · **Posted:** Sun Oct 22, 2017 6:11 am

Man, it sucks to read this, I stopped at swollen chest cavity and I was like, what the fuck. I hope you well and I hope you find a better and well-paying job once you have fully recovered.

EDIT: Also it's great that this isn't an LOA

GoopSauce · **Posted:** Sun Oct 22, 2017 8:13 am

Man sounds like you have been in a valley for a while. Hopefully you are fixing to come back out of that and things will start to look up

Phillip · **Posted:** Sun Oct 22, 2017 8:16 am

This some messed up stuff man! But you don't have to apologize for your behavior you were extremely nice to me.

Needy · **Posted:** Sun Oct 22, 2017 8:35 am

There’s nothing you need to apologise for — most people generally understand.

Central · **Posted:** Mon Oct 30, 2017 8:04 am

No need to apologise bud! Hope you’re alright now!

SemiAutoNoob · **Posted:** Mon Oct 30, 2017 8:12 am

Did you or a passerby perhaps manage to take a video? What’s wrong with the bike? Little bit of elbo grease should be able to fix it right up. Those things usually can take a heavy beating. If it’s just plastics duct tape that shit. Oh and maybe fix your brakes.

Have you found a job yet?

SpazzO · **Posted:** Mon Oct 30, 2017 8:27 am

Shit happens to even the best man. You are a good dude. You been my boi since I started playing EgN servers. Don't be upset man, just recover. You got this. Make life your bitch. If I ever pass through South Carolina, we should chill, smoke and chat.

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